club cinnamon's december newsletter
content warning: watto
happy holidays club cinnamon!
Substack update: I’ll be adjusting the structure of these posts. I’m going to start off with one monthly main bulky post like this one (will include the usual item of the month selfies, life updates, thoughts on whatever dumb thing is happening in the world, online stuff, etc.) and eventually a monthly stand-alone post on one topic. Trying to create some order ‘round here.
Club Cinnamon Item of the Month
December’s item: Watto
Why do I love Watto so much?: He is a rugged, sensual man. He also owns a tiny hat.
I think he’s perfect.
Some of my Watto tweet history:
Sharing the one below with substack club cinnamon only because I think I “breasted too boobily” for main:
Things that happened in December in order of importance to me, a girl whose online display name is cinnamon bun.
New Wallace & Gromit movie dropped this month! Return of the king…
Beanie Baby Gingerbread Cookie. He’s so important.
Luigi
Party City going out of business :( Here’s a pic of a $5 Party City plastic tablecloth that I wore as a dress years ago. You will be missed.
South Korea's President declared martial law for like 5 minutes and was really sorry about it after. I don’t have a pic for this one.
Honorable Mention: A beloved Muppet history fan account with over 500k followers was revealed to be a sex pest. The Muppet community is in shambles.
2024 Club Cinnamon’s Member of the Year
Winner: Eric J!
Eric J reply of the year:
2024 Club Cinnamon’s Most Valuable Player
Winner: Shota Imanaga
Sorry Shohei and Freddie but I like Mike. Shota has helped fill the quirky void left by Dodgers legend Zack Greinke. Shota is unintentionally hilarious and so much fun to watch. He also has really solid stats but my MVP decision was purely vibes based. I simply love a silly guy who can fucking dominate.
2024 Sophie Wrapped!
It’s like Spotify Wrapped but less evil and AI-free! Here are a few of my most listened to luv songs of 2024:
Heard this song from the inside of my boyfriend’s trailer, behind a stage at a music festival. We could overhear Tyler the Creator’s set but neither of us were paying considerable attention to the music — we were relatively busy. It wasn’t until one of the songs transitioned to the Gap Band’s “Outstanding”. We heard a roar from the crowd and my jaw dropped. It’s one of my favorite songs. His immediate reaction was to pull me up from the couch we were on and dance with me. Swaying in a dimly lit, tiny trailer being serenaded by Charlie Wilson. It felt like a dream. Lost track of how many times I’ve said that this year.
I think I played this one nonstop in late April/early May. I had this song pop up on a playlist and found myself connecting to these silly lyrics. It was played in anticipation of my first visit to England in May. I can say with total honesty that the William Orbit connection here is completely unintentional. I wasn’t aware! Sorry sorry sorry!
I stopped using Spotify around March so this was the final song to top my “On Repeat” playlist. Apparently, this song is used as a method of torture at Guantanamo Bay. Google it. Yikes. I shared a first kiss in a hotel lobby to a song that is on a playlist at Gitmo — a sentence I never thought I would write. This is also the first time I’ve ever listened to this song willingly. You typically do not have to go out of your way to listen to this track — it’s a grocery store playlist staple. Feels rather fucked up that I ruined that. Sorry Prince.
This final song isn’t a love song and it can’t be heard anywhere except through my iPhone’s saved voice memos. I wasn’t able to see Belle & Sebastian when they were on tour this year. Listening to twee pop is how I refill my whimsy levels so I was bummed to miss them. Dating someone who is a musician, we surprisingly don’t spend too much time talking about music — but he did ask me which B&S song was my favorite when I was expressing my disappointment in missing them. If You're Feeling Sinister is one of my favorite albums but “Act of the Apostle II” is one of my favorite songs so I said that one. I told him that they never play it live so I wouldn’t have heard it at any of the shows I missed anyway. We had that conversation in the summer. For my birthday in November, I woke up to a voice recording of his rendition of “Act of the Apostle II”. I suppose it’s a love song now.
cb’s diary entry #1: end of the year edition
First diary entry. This is so fun! I feel like I’m writing a note that someone will uncover in an abandoned office in a Resident Evil game.
Here we go! I sound like a broken record but I can’t believe how good this year has been. I spent the very first day of the year ending things with a man who was making me feel like shit about myself. I assumed this year would be a continuation of last year’s shittiness. 2023 was particularly difficult for many reasons and I’ll write about it on here eventually. I posted bits here and there last year — I apologize to those who had to deal with my sporadic sadposting on Twitter and Instagram. I don’t feel sad when I think about last year now and I actually find it quite funny. I was freshly single and have many silly tales to share from that god awful year that some might find relatable.
This year, I met someone who was so patient with me at a time in my life where I just wanted to isolate myself. This is a man who is so busy and has been going through so much himself — graciously making time for me, a woman who did not feel worthy of his love, care, and attention. It felt like the stars aligned for us. It was like whiplash, in the best way. A prodigious difference from the prior man I was talking to who had told me that his inability to show up and be engaged (or, really make an effort to connect with me in a manner that wasn’t purely sexual) was because he was juggling a demanding job (for those who follow the lore: yes it was the folk rock musical theater guy) and he was also going through a lot himself. I showed up for him but it wasn’t reciprocated. Sorry for the Tumblr era teenage girl quote but the phrase “If he wanted to, he would” — is a very real thing. The man I met this year proved that.
Anyway, I continue to feel like I’m in a dream and can’t believe I met such a wonderful, immensely kind man. It’s one of those rare moments where being very online actually worked out considerably well for me. I would not have met him if it wasn’t for our mutual friend who found me through Twitter. I’ll admit — this is an unconventional relationship but it works. It’s quite simple actually — sometimes you just need someone in your life that you can open up to and have a little fun with. In other words, the title of the first track on The Teaches of Peaches.
I’ve overshared this before on the apps but he is older and because of who he is, I know there are many things that I won’t experience with him in this relationship and I’ve gladly accepted that. It’s quite alright — I wouldn’t change anything about this strange little love. I’ve enjoyed going to his house and spending time reading together while I’m nestled in his arms — periodically looking away from our books to exchange a smile and a quick kiss. I’ve enjoyed making him laugh while we’re in the bathtub — he’ll have his eyes closed, relaxing, and I’ll say something and observe him try so hard to not laugh until he completely breaks and bursts out laughing. And I’ve enjoyed doing many other things together that I’d like to keep private! Short response: I love caring for him. This is someone who will always be in my life. It could look differently 6 months from now, 6 years from now — and that’s ok! For now I’m enjoying every message, every sloppy kiss, every voice note he sends me from his iPad, and every little silly moment.
Also! This was the first year that I went to watch the Dodgers in Arizona for spring training and they happened to win the World Series this year. I guess I have to go to Arizona every year now. If you enjoy being around unemployed drunk people, eating a hot dog and watching baseball games at 12PM on a weekday — you absolutely need to check out spring training games, it’s the best. And please do not be upset with me for supporting my hometown team. Things could be worse — I could be a Chicago White Sox fan. Sorry that was mean, I know they’ve suffered enough. However, the White Sox do have a cool dessert on the menu at their ballpark and a guy who shows up to every game wearing the same M&M’s racing jacket. He’s the M&M’s jacket version of Front Row Amy — a woman with huge boobs who goes to every Brewers game and sits in the first row behind home plate. Baseball is so cool.
Finally, I’m going to be living in a new country next year. And no I’m not doing this because the xanned out coconut cop lost. I’m not doing this for a man either. I was born in LA and I feel like I’ve done everything that I wanted to do out here. My family and most of my friends are out here so I know I’ll visit often but a change in scenery is long overdue. I also thought I should take it easy on the air travel. Kind of went crazy with that this year. That being said, it’ll be nice to finally live near a good rail. The train thing but also the sex thing. (My apologies for making a “getting railed” joke. I’m a simple American girl who yearns for a decent rail system).
If you have something that you want to share with me/club cinnamon, newsletter requests/suggestions, want to share pics of things you like, need bad advice, want to discuss geopolitical conflicts, etc. — you can post it in the club cinnamon chat. People in the chat are pretty nice if you need a break from the evil apps.
I’m not nearly as funny or hot as you but you continuously give me hope that I can find love and that is reason enough to stick around.
Happy that you're happy.